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you can just go as a bitch.’ The worst is when I giggle; teenagers hate to be laughed at.But what else can you do when after 60-odd years of eating apples an 11-year-old tells you you’re doing it wrong? What I have taken from it is the following: teenagers lie, disobey, and refuse to do household chores. Wolf accepts the reality, doesn’t waste energy in wishing it were different, and advises us how to handle it.If having a teenager do nothing is acceptable to you, then do not nag.But if it is not, you are stuck with nagging.”I always find myself surprised when it works.
The one that moved me close to tears was ‘happy.’ But I did wonder if they had the right child. Wolf says the child self and the becoming-adult self live side by side in the teenager, and if things are going right, she will reserve the child-self for home, while the outside world gets the grown-up. It wasn’t all that bad being a little kid - it’s tough to give up all the perks of childhood and venture out into a world where you’ll have to make your own way and do your own laundry, especially when you secretly fear you won’t be able to.
When our teenagers are hysterical, we must try not to be, and reserve our creative counterattacks for our rich fantasy life.